Wait, I'm Fat?!

I have returned from the Land of the Dead, aka the Land of the Sick. I am FINALLY able to breathe through my nose. Muscle and body aches are going away. Fever is gone. By gosh, I was actually sick.

Needless to say, 2013 hasn't started out how I would have liked it, but I'm sure it could be a lot worse. Like starting the year off with a zombie apocalypse or something. Haven't been to the gym yet. But I'm going tomorrow because I promised the hubby I would!

I also ordered something called the Ultimate Reset at the suggestions of my Beachbody coach, Amanda. The UR is supposed to help your body detox in a period of 21 days. I did a lot of research prior to ordering it and it seems sound. No starving, fasting, drinking maple syrup and dinosaur pee, nothing like that. Basically, there are 6 supplements that you take that assist in cleansing your body from the inside out while eating healthy food. I'll be posting my experience when I start...I'm anxious for it to get here! I think that weight loss will be a great side effect, but mostly I need to clean all the crap out of my body.

Speaking of food and weight loss, I saw the dietician Thursday. She told me I was fat.

OMGZ NO WAY! Totally missed that. Captain Obvious.

So, I've been put on something called the Protein Sparing Modified Fast (PSMF). Basically, it's a heavy protein diet. And if I was low-carb before, this is NO carb. I get 1.5 to 2 servings of veggies a day, 15 ounces of meat, and no fruit. I have to take prescription potassium pills, as well as a multivitamin (which I already do), and magnesium, calcium, and fiber supplements. I have to go monthly to get my bloodwork done to make sure my body is still functioning correctly. Basically, the giant amounts of protein will force my body into ketosis, where it is burning my fat for fuel rather than carbs. This produces ketones in your urine...and apparently can be hard on your kidneys. You do lose weight quickly though, and then go through "refeeding" where you introduce carbs again. I get to pee on a stick every day too, to see if I'm producing ketones. It's like taking a pregnancy test, but not nearly as fear inducing, I think.

I'm planning on starting this after I finish the UR. I'll be posting about that too...can I give up my precious carbs? We'll see.

So, a reward list. Here is what I'm going to reward myself with:

10 lbs: new nail polish.
20 lbs: 10 new songs from iTunes
30 lbs: manicure!
40 lbs: new workout outfit
50 lbs: another tattoo. I'm addicted.
60 lbs: new shoes
70 lbs: a new dress. Like, a nice one. That shows lots of boob.
80 lbs: Coach purse!
90 lbs:  new clothes!

I must go to bed now. I have to get up for the gym, and I'm getting inked again tomorrow. I told you I was addicted!